i took a trip to the hospital today
to see where that would put me
all i got from it was an experience
i didn't want to live
a bottle of pills
poped them all at once
then some alcohol to wash it all down
a life so messed up
a life so profound
i didn't want to live anymore
maybe i was being selfish and unkind
but the pain i was feeling hurt so badly inside
now my stomach hurts
my head is throbing and it won't stop
i feel so sick
i'm losing my breath
No one really cares that much
all my friends could give a shit
about where i've been or done
they don't seem to care to much
espically when i want to give up
sure they have been there time and again
but when i really needed them
they seemed to fanish and grow dim
my family was there for me everytime when i wanted to end my life
but they wouldn't understand
all the pain i've faught every single night
they don't know the tears i've cried when i'm all alone
what i feel inside
how i've grown so cold
how i've grown alone
they woulnd't understand
cuz they can't understand me
sure they know me, but it doesn't go that deep
all my relashionships seemed to fail
and my heart broke everytime
healed then shattered
seems like it never had an end
music was an escape from all the wild insanity
that drove me to my death
or my drugs.. just another escape
another way out
a place i could go and hide
when i didn't want to figure things out
it got so late some nights
when i would just crawl into a ball and cry
thinking, what am i living for at all
then your voice came to me
like it use to do at night
you use to sing me to sleep
tell me everything would be alright
but then i have to stop
and think really hard
cuz every since you left me
everything has been so hard
so difficult to cope with
to hard to just get by
cuz every since you died
my life has been empty and deprived
so what am i to do now?
just give up, and watch myself die
leave everything i once knew to wither and dry
or am i suppose to watch myself grow older
and try to be real strong
but see i've tried that
i've tried for so long
i just can't take it anymore
i just can't take the pain
but inside, i know i'll have to live another day
so what am i suppose to do now...?
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