Friday, December 26, 2008

Can't balance life without work - Musings - Twister off a brief Vacation

I think it has been quite a bit of time since I posted my last blog. I would be lying had I told I’ve been a bit busy as usual. And ain’t that short of some stuff either to ponder. The fact is that I had a lot of things I had to share. Except that im suffering from extended procrastination for quite a period of time. Which explains why I keep deferring posting my desultory musings.

Now after a brief vacation (off from the pandemonistic life) hoping that I’d come back refreshed, inturn ended up in a total turmoil. Feeling restless, regret and pain. (Why is it so ??, not that I know !!!) which is why I’ve decided to ease myself musing out. So please bother not if I do sound insane (as usual).

The sudden surge of happenings since then had perturbed me and left me gasping for breath. It’s not that I’m up to an wild-ghost ride. It’s just that I had been so institutionalized within my surroundings for a while (for which I had been turning down even the thought of shifting my job). Now that things are beginning to change it seems life has started to knock me off my balance. I ain’t afraid of it as I hope that it could at least help in stirring the dormant underdog in me.

I feel like im often straying off my limits (lower) to the extent that I have never been thought before. They say when you are performing at your limits you should be happy for yourself. Because that is where you want to be…. Nah thatz the upper limit (well it seems im dwelling too much into the issue lemme make it straight)

I think its high time I had to scramble myself to rise up not for any occasion as such but to lift my spirits atleast. It seems too much for myself now to rest upon my extinct laurels, something I can only reminisce now. Im looking for one such occasion though I know its absolute stupidity to wait for an occasion to rise upon to chase your dreams. Somehow I can’t help myself from this state of informed pessimism (or whatever pshycs call it) as it had ran all down to my spine vilifying me. I think I need a voltage potential like a fully dried battery to bounce back into action. Which exactly Is what im looking for. And im too tired of looking for it every now and then all these years hoping this would end my profound slothfulness.

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