On a Runaway Train !!

So tired that I couldn't even sleep..
So many secrets I couldn't keep..
Promised myself I wouldn't weep..
One more promise I couldn't keep...

 

It seems no one can help me now..
I'm in too deep.!
There's no way out.
I've really led myself astray..

 

Runaway train never going back,
Wrong way on a one way track..
Seems like I should be getting nowhere.!
Somehow I'm neither here nor there..

 

Can you help me remember how to smile?
Make it somehow all seem worthwhile?
How on earth did I get so jaded?
Life's mystery seems so faded..

 

I can go where no one else can go..
I know what no one else knows..
But here I'm drowning in the rain
With a ticket for the runaway train..

Friends Forever....

 

 

an ode to all of my friends..all of you ..... 

 

As we go on
We remember
All the times we
Had together
And as our lives change
Come Whatever
We will still be
Friends Forever

 

So if we get the big jobs
And we make the big money
When we look back now
Will our jokes still be funny?
Will we still remember everything we learned in school?
Still be trying to break every single rule
I keep, I keep thinking that it's not goodbye
Keep on thinking it's a time to fly
And this is how it feels
We will still be friends forever

 

Will we think about tomorrow like we think about now?
Can we survive it out there?
Can we make it somehow?
I guess I thought that this would never end
And suddenly it's like we're women and men
Will the past be a shadow that will follow us 'round?
Will these memories fade when I leave my town
I keep, I keep thinking that it's not goodbye
Keep on thinking it's a time to fly

 

and we'll still be FRIENDS FOREVER!!

Just be yourself...

The wall you’ve build up around you,
Trying to hide away from me,
Let me tell it is as safe
As hiding yourself in a glass house
through which anyone can see....

 

You say the sweetest of the sweet words,
In that dreaded name of courteousness
But the words spoken to many others
Hold no more beauty than
The painted birds with beautiful feathers.

 

Why, I ask you again and again
Just calm yourself and breathe again
Why be a statue with a carved smile
When beneath I know there is a genuine one
You tell me you’ve seen the world,
I do not defy it at all
Older that me, I know it is true
But that doesn’t give you
A license to feign…

 

Masking yourself from the big bad world
Trust me there is good if you search for it
I am not asking you much that you cannot give
Just be what you are, your raeal self!

It Rains

It rains.

 

Kids run wearing bright raincoats,
Jumping, hopping, splashing the waters.
Adults wade through the knee-level water,
Slippers in one hand, umbrella in other;
Some cycle through the drizzling path,
Some have a rickshaw-ride:
There's one who does nothing.

 

It rains.
Men quicken to get some spicy food,
Women start preparing tea or coffee.
Aged persons sit at a window or veranda
Glimpsing the active drops fall before them.
A mother gives her child a surprise-
The baby watches, smelling the freshness:
There's one who does nothing.

 

It rains.
We plan out a football match,
Rush for the nearby pond to swim,
Reach the terrace for the world's view.
We also bet a race across the road,
Challenge a walk over a wall
Or play out a scene in the rain:
There's one who does nothing.

 

It rains.
There's one who does nothing.
As if for him the waters fall not,
And if they fall, they reach not the ground
And if they reach the ground
They excite him not-
As if for him there's no rain
There's no sunshine for him either,
Neither love nor hate: thus, no life.
There's one living as if he had no life.
It rains?

Whispers of the Call !!!

Whispers of the Call

The Call
Carry the ways of the wise on your shoulders;
bear the burdens of your ancestors and
Deliver the exiles to their homes.

Create a new nation of wanderers
whose spark of the divine will light the path to eternity

Suppress the seeds of discord in your heart and
kill the desire of lust in your loins
for those things which are taboo

Instill the waves of harmony and love within you. Cultivate the flow of truthful face so that shadows of lies do not befall your countenance.

Go to the mountain. Do not let the mountain come to you.
Sit in its verdant valley of greens and yellows;
let the sparkling spring of summer soothe you.
Learn from its inhabitants then go out and share the wisdom.

Keep the secrets of the divine in your heart
until the world is ready to receive them.
Only then, can you come home.

For now...rest when you can,
for the days are long and weary.
In the ineffable name.
So mote it be.

Here Iam !!! This is me !!!

Here I am
Portions of self
Contained replica, snatches of reality
Where did I go?
Who was I?
Lore of self a mask of people
Re-define my space
Upload my memory
Download my life
In a beamless bottle
Lightless, breathless
for I lay there Lifeless.....

My Dignity

My dignity is personal.
It doesn’t belong to you.
It belongs to me.
You have no right to injure

No right to condemn
No right to trample
No right to sneer
For the show of disrespect,

I will spit you out of my mouth
I will shun you in public

You are air to me.
What message shall I send
To make you understand that
I will not put up with your bullshit?.
That I will not cater to your insecurities?

My will is still strong.
My hatred runs deep.
Are you ready to reap the whirlwind?
Prepare yourself, for where I take you,
No one will stand beside you.

I take back the hand I held out in friendship.
I take back the compassion I gave.
I take back the understanding, when no one else did.
I take back the love.

When the hour of need is strong,
Do not look for me, for I will not be there for you.
You no longer exist in my life.
So mote it be.

Just as I am

Just as I am

Is all the world will ever need of me
No long speeches
Dramatic gestures
Or hyperbolic ways

What you see is what you get
Nothing more; nothing less
My ways are transparent
My life, simple and sweet

Look for the tiniest grain of sand,
I am there.

Think the loftiest dreams of thought,
I am there.

Find the scum of the earth,
I am there.

For every song sung,
Every celebration of life,
Every tear of loss,
I linger there.

Do not betray my trust,
Do not betray my respect,
Do not betray my friendship,
Do not betray my love;
For in so doing,
I will be destroyed.

In the cold of winter,
the heat of summer,
the cool of spring,
My presence will whisper to you
And you shall remember me,
Even when I am only a distant memory.

Musings !! Im who im not !!!

To run from yourself, you need a lot of space; for the self has a strange knack of catching up with itself.

And so half way through our lives, we're panting, gasping for breath not knowing what we're running to or away from, thinking we're moving ahead when all we're doing is moving in circles after ourselves, behind ourselves.

I read this quote somewhere in blogsphere a few days ago and couldn't help but wonder at how the writer had so beautifully hit on the truth. Of how so many of the human kind are so ill at ease with themselves, not knowing what to do with the way they think and act and behave.

So they, and I, we put up a facade trying to be someone we are not, trying to fit in where we don't, even look the way we don't. Sometimes we break free from the shackles of stereotypes voluntarily and sometimes our facade gives way, exposing who we truly are - to ourselves and the world. Sometimes, we put up a front of fighting the stereotypes when we privately play along with them, believing in them. The bottom line is we're trying to be people we want to be and what we want to be isn't always what we are born to be.

How uncomfortable then you can get in your own skin as you struggle to make it fit this false you. And it keeps slipping away. Somehow, the happiest people are those who are fine being who they are and don't have to say 'Let Me Be Me' 'cause they are being them!PS: If this sounds like me philosophising, well, may be I am!

MySelf vs My Created Self

The end is the beginning?

Have I arrived or am I leaving...

The world is round they say,

Will I come back from where I'm embarking?

Is this an end or a beginning?

Im Back !!!

After a week loooong leave and a week loooong laziness, im back.....

An then comes the question what if i come back or not.... Neither im going to make any difference nor im going to get readers...

Ride to Oblivion - Vellore Drive 12-11-06

Who Am I

What Famous Leader Are You?
personality tests by similarminds.com

Brahmin tamil...

Hey guys check-out this article in wiki on Brahmin tamil... Hilarious isn't it..
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Braahmik#Braahmik_.2F_Lesson_1
--
With regards

Subbu... ( ur Chuppandi for ever )

Total Chaos

I am in one of my infamous rambling and grumbling moods tonite... Why is that my books have to be in my bookshelf and why not just strewn around in my living room? After all I live there. and why is that my office binny should be neat and spotless with everything arranged in their places? why is that my whiteboard should make sense to all and sundry? Am I not allowed to write my own crypts? What I whiteboard makes sense to me!!!Why should I always take the shortest route to my mailbox? Why not walk a new route every now and then? Why must I be organized when I can perfectly make sense out of the nonsense I create? And why must I work from 9am-5pm and not 9pm-5am when I am wide alert???

I love the chaos I create arnd me...books arnd me, my cds closeby, my papers scattered haphazardly - everything within a hand's reach. Yeah, I sometimes misplace my stuff but thats ok since I always manage to locate them. I have to endure lectures from all and sundry abt my so-called sloppiness and laziness and then help them locate their missing stuff!!!! If organized means they can find what they want when they want it, then I wonder why I am often called to help find things my 'organized' friends/family keep misplacing.

Grrrrrrrrrrrrr......

Fine Leg....

Some people argue that BCCI should break away from the ICC and fix major tournaments to ensure an Indian victory. Whereas you can treat that as a comment made in a lighter vein, it is hard to separate BCCI's rise to dominance of world over the past decade from India's own economic growth.

For one, the growth has been staggering. The beneficiaries in both cases have been few. In cricket, there is a huge gulf between earnings of players at the international level and domestic levels. And most of this growth hasn't really translated into changes in infrastructure.

Back when we were kids, the papers used to scream for structural changes in Indian cricket, based on the Australian model. Today, nothing has changed. Except that the BCCI can claim to be world's richest sporting body, surpassing footballing heavyweights like Juventus, Real Madrid and Manchester United.

Unlike in the case of these football clubs, India's dominance of the economics of cricket isn't because we are/were the best for any considerable period of time. As Chappell himself puts it, our cricketers haven't won any major tournament on foreign soil in over two decades. The rise to riches in Indian cricket is not because we were superior to any of the other cricket-playing nations. It is merely a reflection of our population, and an acknowledgement of its spending power.

As India rises to prominence among nations, especially in areas where the country can assert its burgeoning middle-class, it pays to wonder whether this sheer strength in numbers alone is enough to help us remain there. When will we realise that mere brute force bends? Our policymakers would do well to learn from our experiences on the cricket field

Me and My World

Cant tell what you wont grasp
Cant show what you wont see
For my world is a notion to you
A Reality meant only for me

Bother not, if you fail to know
Worry not if I refuse to clarify
For my world lives in me
In me must It also die

If I appear insane, so be it
Its true, the way you know
I care less, for what you see
Who I am, I alone know

Wandering Minds

Some days I felt guilty because of frequent mind-wandering at work, so I find following numbers are quite comforting:

Dr. Michael Kane, a psychologist at the University of North Carolina at Greensboro, recently sampled the thoughts of students at eight random times a day for a week. He found that on average, they were not thinking about what they were doing 30% of the time.For some students it was between 80% and 90% of the time. Out of the 126 participants, only one denied any mind-wandering at the sampled moments. Prior work has also turned up average rates of 30% to 40% in everyday life.

It appears our mind are weired to wander. "Mind wandering is not objectively good or bad. It depends on the context in which it occurs", Dr. Kane said. Mind wandering may enable us to do multi-tasking and creative thinking. Life usually doesn't demand our full attention after all.

Minds and Matters

Small minds discuss people

Average minds discuss events

Great minds discuss ideas

Noble minds work in silence

Yendaroo Mahaanubaavulu, Andariki Vandanamulu

One is losing a big piece of enjoyment in his life if he is not enjoying the intricacies of carnatic Music – Sujatha mentions in his latest katrathum pertrathum.

I am one of those unlucky person. I try to develop my listening to carnatic music but at somepoint of time i do lose out especially telugu kirtanais. But thanks to hundreds and hundreds of tamil kirtanais and pathigams. It save me and also raises my hope of getting a bit of those blisfull moments poeple get into while listening to or performing kutcheris.

I have got some decent collection of tamil kirtanais and my best of it is Oothukaadu Venkatasubbier songs by God’s own Maharajapuram santhanam. I think nobody can sing Thayae yesodha better than him. Also i have pretty decent collection of papanasan Sivan kirtanais ( Kavava is my favourite – singer sudha ragunathan ) and Bharathiyar songs ( Fav: Thikku theriyatha kaatil - Unnikrishnan ).The Icing on the cake is ‘Kurai Ondrum Illai’ Sung by MS Subbulakshmi. Everytime i listen to his song i feel something rolling in my stomach. Powerful song